Happy Father's Day

When I wake up tomorrow, I fully expect a grand celebration. The anticipation may make it hard to sleep tonight. I've earned a little something after tallying the physical and emotional sacrifices. A steamy coffee, hand-delivered in a mug with the inscription "World's BEST Dad," would be a suitable symbolic gesture for someone who pours himself out as a primary caregiver, elementary homeschooler, and spiritual advisor.

Speaking of the best, Roger Federer recently shared some advice with college graduates that every Dad should also take to heart:

"You can't win everything, and each particular point doesn't matter. It's the whole match and the whole adventure."

Parenting is a difficult daily adventure. It requires a serious effort to harness the mighty power of childhood with the grand hope of giving them a fighting chance. After ten years in the business of being a Dad, I have a good thing going. Some days, I get it right. Most of the time, I get pretty close.

Outside of one June weekend, I don't even pretend to be the best. For me, it'll be back to basics on Monday morning. And that means trying to be the W.O.R.S.T.

Being the W.O.R.S.T. is a fun acronym to help explain how we encourage the big ideas of working, going outside, avoiding a rush, and opting out of youth sports while still caring for each other as a team. Our unique standard results from a lengthy phase of trial and error. It's also our natural survival instinct.

We talk a lot about work. More specifically, we talk about hard work. First and foremost, when we look at our homeschool curriculum, we make sure it remains challenging. The kids still push back and complain. At the same time, they know exactly what I will say when they do. Being blessed with (4) very healthy boys, we also seek out opportunities for manual labor. We have plenty of home projects, but ideally, it's hard work serving others. We jumped at the chance to harvest a half-acre of sweet corn by hand to help fight food insecurity in our community!

We not only work hard, but we play hard, too. If you want to get that boost of vitamin D, fresh air in your lungs, mud between your toes, or snowflakes to land on your nose and eyelashes, you must get outside. Our boys get to go outside on their own. Rain or shine, I encourage it. Beyond having the space to run, jump, and climb, they will invent delightful (sometimes dangerous) games together. Our first-aid kit stays well stocked, and our laundry baskets constantly overflow. Open-ended outdoor exploration is always exciting.

I am just as intentional about what we do as what we do not do. When we are at our best, we don't rush. Our kids know nothing about the routine morning chaos that awaits most of their friends. We don't talk about what happens between the sounds of alarm clocks and the school bells. Not rushing is a beautiful way to eliminate a significant stressor. The luxury of having a parent who can stay home means that we have every opportunity to sleep well, eat slowly, and breathe deeply when the day begins.

Here is where the real controversy comes in: We avoid youth sports. It's not because we don't believe in the benefits of organized activities, and it's not because our kids aren't continuously asking to join a league. Instead, our kids play at home, where we sample from a full sports buffet. We carefully nurture their natural abilities and help them develop a range of skills. We also ignore the push and pressure to allow it to become the centerpiece of our lives.

But make no mistake, we know how a strong team works. We value cooperation, share responsibilities, and work towards a common goal. Our team thrives because we are committed to doing this together. At dinnertime, we believe in sitting nice, eating nice, and waiting for everyone to finish. I never signed up to be their chef, chauffeur, or sheriff. It takes all of us to keep this home from falling apart. One day, we'll print it on a t-shirt: Team Stryker does life together.

In short, being the W.O.R.S.T. works for us. But I'll raise my mug in the morning to honor all the BEST Dads. Even if we don't win every point, we're making their world a better place now and in the future. Let's all stay focused on the whole adventure of childhood.